I thought it would be fun to create a little something for the run-up to valentine’s day.
I wanted to do something for myself and for those who might want to encourage self-love during this month of love.
I did not want to do a whole post on why you need to love yourself or nobody else will. That statement is used all of the time, although the quote is well intended I personally feel like it encourages a false sense of what self-love is really about. Loving yourself is more about you then it is about the way others treat you. The two go hand in hand yes! But loving yourself comes with a list of complexities that don’t end once someone else loves you.
I have posted an honest and encouraging post on my Instagram. Self-care for me is small simple tasks, I need things that are easy to do and can be done at almost anytime. I do not set certain days to practise self-care because I can only handle a certain amount of structure in my life. Structure and routine are good and to be honest, I need it, however, setting it for myself and actually following it is a whole other story.
Here are a few things I did the run-up to valentine’s day:
Hair Care & Chill: I mentioned in my What Does my Self Care Routine Look Like the post that Wash Day is the day I spend the most time on myself, doing all the little things that improve my mood. I will light some incense and candles, put on a movie or play my favourite songs. Set the mood for some relaxation so that I can do my hair with a stress-free mindset.
Alone Time: I love to just be by myself doing nothing, sometimes that is all I need. I struggle with staying present, my mind wanders a lot and it makes it hard for me to focus. So I like to lay in the dark with nothing but the outdoor noise, some people like to listen to the rain, I like the sound of the motorway, the cars speeding past, the police sirens, people talking and just the breeze. Silence for me doesn’t mean complete silence.
Break Time: I am the worst sometimes, it takes for me to get close to tears before I realise I need to take a break. Keeping busy is way my way of coping, but too much of anything is bad. I constantly have to remind myself to take some time out for me, this can be taking a day off work or spending my days off doing nothing.
Laugh: I love to laugh, If I’m not laughing I’m smiling. It is really important to laugh not only with others but to also laugh at yourself. Laugh when you make mistakes, we have to make mistakes in order to learn. I like to put on a funny animation or a comedy when I am feeling anxious.
What Do I Need? Sometimes you really have to ask yourself “what is it that I need right now?” Whether it’s a new pair of shoes you have been eyeing up (treat yourself), or a conscious reminder to eat breakfast. Asking yourself what you need can range from a basic task, something small to something bigger.
Self Awareness: I have been making a conscious effort to look at some of the things I do and say. I will say it out loud and evaluate why I feel the way I do and change it if necessary. So recently I told my mum that I find myself getting jealous of other people’s achievements, even though I know it is wrong, it still happens and I want to be able to deal with it. I still need to figure out the root of the issue, so I can tackle it that way.
Expanding My Circle: Now forming new relationships was not something I initially thought would be included in my self-care routine. When I look at my life and realise the impact positive people have on it, I started to realise that I needed to be open to form new relationships. I am a creature of comfort so I have stuck with the same people for years.
These are a few of the things I have done during the run-up to V Day. If you are following me on Instagram then you will see some more posts and there will be a special video on valentine’s explaining why I believe self-love is one of the hardest, most rewarding things to do.